All Are Welcome, All Are Welcome

Working The Online Mojo in my office/studio.

 

Happy July! I’m entering a new phase of the Covera and all are welcome. Welcome to join me for yoga from anywhere. I know it’s a bummer. Online yoga, live or recorded, has some drawbacks.

One of my clients mentioned that one of the most valuable things about my yoga as compared to other yoga is my commanding personal presence. The Beard would simply say I’m a raging bitch. The beauty of The F*cking Yoga Co. is my particular style of yoga is informed by age, injury, and illness. It’s accessible, and there is no one perfect alignment.

 

Being in class with me gives a client the opportunity for direct support with their form.

 

True. And I miss offering that kind of guidance. I miss the in-person stuff too. The grunts and groans that tell me you are finding your pose and making changes. The call outs to you regulars who have come week in and week out. Cueing the corrections as I see you struggle in class. Oh, hell, I miss an audience. Yoga ego. That said, many states that reopened are having to shut down again. The pandemic isn’t over. It’s just getting into gear. 

Moving my brand online has been a serious learning curve, and it isn’t over.

 

I’m not the Zennest of instructors. I’m carrying an extra thirty pounds. I’m fifty-one years old. I don’t have a sleek, super-styled video space.  I don’t speak in dulcet yoga tones. I’m tattooed as fuck. Oh, and I swear.

My yoga is accessible. I’m real. All of my yoga is based on useful poses that serve you rather than your (or MY) ego. No one needs to be able to wrap their leg around their neck. It isn’t a life skill or natural movement. Sure, my groove works best in person, but let’s face it, I’m not everyone’s cup o’ tea.

 

In fact, I’m a three-finger pour of a smoky Mezcal.

 

Believe me, the idea of reinventing myself AGAIN at my age is a little nauseating. The yoga market is full of lithe, “Zen,” white girls offering chakra tuning and energetic herbally whatnot. That’s not me.

I’m not going to tell you to stop drinking coffee or wine or whisky. Yes, I’d like to be thirty pounds thinner, but I also know chocolate cake is cheaper than Botox or Restylane.

The problem I have with current yoga models is the phony spiritual hocus pocus that seems to be the main selling point. It’s all based on gobbledygook with minimal connections or understanding to/of traditional yoga philosophy.

I like to start with the physical and let you find your own groove. If you keep at it, you’ll eventually get there and without misappropriating a religion, a culture, and frankly, sounding like a dolt. Common sense applies. The value of Modern Transactional Physical Yoga isn’t diminished because we’re not chanting, digging into our chakras, or setting mystical intentions.

I think not murdering some asshole on the road is a perfectly valid intention.

So, if you’ve practiced yoga with me before, I need your help. I’m trying to get my online game going. It’s the only way I make a living and given the continuing pandemic it’s the only way y’all are going to see me. Unless you can spot me in my mask at the grocery.

 

July’s Special Pricing: Keeping me safe, keeping you safe.

 

Help a yoga bitch out. Check out my calendar or hit me up on the website.