I Don’t DO Yoga Pants

I get around. Cycle. Pilates. Strength and Sculpt. And, yes, yoga. This means I get a lot of crossover clients. People who dig my style of instruction and decide to check out the other classes I teach. It’s how I get a lot of my male yoga regulars. They come to cycle or strength class and think I may be the ONE yoga instructor they can stand.

 

I know because they say it on the reg. “I think I should try your yoga class. I know I need to stretch more, BUT I don’t DO yoga pants,” they say this with emphasis. Like yoga pants is a requirement for everyone. They say it firmly like they think I’m going to fit them for spandex right on the spot. I don’t even do typical yoga pants.

 

I have a long inseam, and I’m short wasted with some JLo booty. Let me translate for the cishet men out there, typical yoga pants are long-legged pants with a little flare at the ankle. They may or may not have a foldover waistband.

 

 

Exhibit A: The Typical Yoga Pant

 

These pants are crazy flattering and comfortable. THAT’S why women like to wear them. We don’t care what people think about how they look. The challenge for me is they tend to run long in length. That doesn’t bode well for stepping around on a yoga mat. Hence, I don’t DO yoga pants.

 

I DO encourage all of my male clients to take up yoga. And if I haven’t said it in this post yet, yoga is about strength AND stretching.

 

Yoga clothes, or rather let’s start saying clothes you can do yoga in, should be comfortable and offer you a range of motion. There are a lot of brands of workout pants out there that offer both of those qualities. An essential pair of what they now call ‘jogger’ pants (in the OLDEN days, they were called sweatpants) would serve you well as long as they are lightweight. A heavy pair of sweats will lead to perspiration. Mind you, we are going to sweat a bit, but no sense in starting out with a disadvantage.

 

Classic sweatpants and by classic, I mean old school.

 

The Beard likes a pair of lightweight sweat-STYLE pants with a tapered leg. He’s about one hundred percent Irish (Thank you, 23andMe), and his high-end temperature tolerance is about seventy degrees Fahrenheit. He also hates to sweat and doesn’t DO yoga either because “The teacher is a bitch.” Despite his glowing review of my yoga class, I think these are a solid choice if you want to try yoga.

They breathe, they offer a great range of motion, and they look pretty good.

 

Everyone likes a little style.

 

If you don’t know how you will react to yoga, a pair of athletic shorts with compression briefs is a great place to start. I say compression briefs for a couple of reasons: yes, I have raised three boys. One of whom has an inseam two-thirds the length of my entire body. When playing soccer or basketball, shorts can catch a breeze, and if you fall, well, it’s not only women who can go skirts over hips.

If you didn’t already know, yoga means laying down, folding over, legs in the air. It helps a man stay in the yoga mindset if he isn’t tugging his shorts down or worrying about gapping. It also makes me more comfortable if I am helping you.

 

I prefer not to be scarred if you know what I mean.

 

Also, you (men) will feel more comfortable moving and stretching if everything is secure. Yoga is uncomfortable enough without adding extra variables.

 

I’ve said this before, and I’ll keep saying it. It’s HAMMER TIME! My favorite go-to yoga pant (or any pant for that matter) is the harem-style pant. The 80s did not ruin the harem pant, FIGHT ME.

 

Don’t mind the flash. I LOVE these pants!

 

I have several different styles, and I’m going to be attempting to make my own, so I can be sure I always have access to them. These pants have a wide waistband, so there is very little rolling. The voluminous legs mean an unfettered range of motion. And the gathered ankles mean they are going to stay put no matter the pose.

 

And under no circumstance do you have to spend more than twenty or thirty dollars for a pair of yoga pants. Seriously, forget the Lula hulas. Ignore the Pir-anhas. And I don’t care what Goldie Hawn 2.0 says, no everyday yoga pant costs $99.00.

 

Find a comfortable pair of athletic pants and get your ass into class!